Two Simple Steps To Help You Deal With Your Anger & Use It For Personal Growth






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The emotion of anger is a powerful energy that can be used to set yourself free or it can be used to kill yourself and your loved ones, just like electricity can be life giving or life taking, depending on how we use it.

“Anger is an Energy of Separation. If used properly it can help us separate from dictatorship, tyranny or old harmful traditions. It can help us become free.”

– Michael Allenbright

Unfortunately, religion and modern day spirituality have created a mindset that anger is bad and we must replace it with forgiveness (which is generally interpreted as compromising your own well-being).

Have you experienced anger with your parents, or significant other, or your boss, or in any other form of relationship?

The anger is an alarm signal​ that is telling you that something is off in a relationship that needs to be fixed. It is an early warning system that is trying to protect you from harm later on.

The anger could be on either side or both sides of the relationship.

If you ignore this alarm, for any number of reasons, the results can be catastrophic. The negative energy of anger keeps building up until it finally explodes, resulting in serious damage that could have been avoided with proper action. This can happen for yourself, or a loved one, or for your country because “you” (the leader) did not take appropriate steps early enough. Just a few examples:

  • Serious health issues arise suddenly
  • Relationships break up suddenly
  • A lawsuit comes in the mail out of nowhere
  • Police come to the doorstep
  • A loved one gets into a harmful situation suddenly
  • War breaks out without enough warning
  • Sudden cases of genocide
  • Terrorist attacks

Processing the anger in a way that is beneficial for you and your loved ones is a two-step process:

Step 1

When anger arises (on either side), look at the cause of the anger. What is triggering the anger? Anger is telling you that something is intruding into your energy field; that you or your loved one is in danger and you need to take “appropriate action.”

Have you ever gotten near a mother goose who has little babies? The mother instantly goes on alert and starts to hiss with anger to ward off the danger.

In the case of humans, the danger is not clear. It requires a great deal of wisdom and clarity to identity the danger. Just a few examples of danger could be:

  • Your emotional needs are not being met. If this continues for an extended duration, it can lead to health problems.
  • A relationship is inhibiting you from growing to your full potential. This can eventually result in the loss of your dreams and life purpose.
  • You are giving too much and not getting enough back in return. This will leave you depleted after a while.
  • You are being emotionally or physically manipulated by self serving narcissists. This will eventually lead to a loss of self-worth and self-esteem, which have serious consequences such as onset of anxiety and depression.

Step 2

Identify appropriate action to resolve the situation that is causing the anger on either side. Some examples of appropriate action could be:

  • Clarify the issue and work it out with the other side to make sure that the needs of both sides are met properly.
  • Get help from someone who can help resolve the conflict.
  • Build compassion toward the other party and see if that helps.
  • Make compromises that are acceptable to both sides.
  • Leave the relationship.

I have found in my healing work that identifying the causes and appropriate action from a spiritual standpoint​ helps resolve the problem with much greater ease than otherwise possible. Of course, you need to be ready to look at it from a spiritual standpoint.


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