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April 2nd, 2021 
Awake Goy 
After Fun April Fools’ Day Of Telling Jokes, Babylon Bee To Return To Real News Tomorrow
JUPITER, FL—After a fun, prank-filled day of telling jokes at The Babylon Bee, the popular website announced they would be returning to real news tomorrow.
“Yeah, we have to loosen up once in a while and have fun,” said CEO Seth Dillon as he put on goggles, preparing for his daily swim in his pile of cash. “But business is business, and the party is now over. It’s time to return to writing tomorrow’s headlines today and being more accurate than any LAMESTREAM media outlet like CNN or The New York Times.”
The site published many hilarious jokes over the course of April 1, as is their tradition, but from April 2 all the way until March 31 of next year, The Babylon Bee says they are committed to being the most accurate, truthful news source on the planet.
Creative Director Ethan Nicolle, who is responsible for taking the 100% real photographs the website uses in its real news reports, said he enjoyed the day of pranks and frivolity but is looking forward to getting back to the real news beat. “It’s a hard job, but someone has to do it,” he said as he smoked a cigar outside the California office. “Whenever there’s real news, like AOC strangling herself with her shoelaces, or Trump launching kamikaze bears, I’ll be there on the scene, taking pictures of the whole thing.”
“Sad. Not good!” said Editor-in-Chief Kyle Mann.
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