Theater of the Absurd: Funny jewish Holocaust Testimonies

The so-called ‘Holocaust’ – Theatre of the Absurd
Beware! If you dare to question anything on this list, be prepared to accept the consequences….you will be imprisoned in many countries.
  • Mass graves expelling geysers of blood;[1]
  • Acid or boiling-water baths to produce human skeletons;[2]
  • Injections into the eyes of inmates to change their eye color;[3]
  • Production of shrunken heads from bodies of inmates;[4]
  • Skimming off boiling human fat from open-air cremation fires;[5]
  • Out of pity for complete strangers – a jewish mother and her child – an SS-man leaps into the gas chamber voluntarily at the last second in order to die with them;[6]
  • Soap production from human fat, solemn burial of soap;[7]
  • Underground mass extermination in enormous rooms, by means of high voltage electricity;[8]
  • Killing in vacuum chamber or with steam or chlorine gas;[9]
  • Mass graves with hundreds of thousands of bodies, removed without a trace within a few weeks; a true miracle of improvisation on the part of the Germans;[10]
  • Gas chambers on wheels in Treblinka, which dumped their victims directly into burning pits; delayed-action poison gas that allowed the victims to leave the gas chambers and walk to the mass graves by themselves;[11]
  • Electrical conveyor-belt executions;[12]
  • Cremation of bodies in blast furnaces;[13]
  • SS bicycle races in the gas chamber of Birkenau;[14]
  • Removal of corpses by means of blasting, i.e., blowing them up;[15]
  • Blue haze after gassing with hydrocyanic acid (which is colorless);[16]
  • Singing of national anthems and the Internationales by the victims in the gas chamber; evidence for atrocity propaganda of Communist origin;[17]
  • Rapid-construction portable gas chamber sheds;[18]
  • Killing by drinking a glass of liquid hydrocyanic acid;[19]
  • Muscles cut from the legs of executed inmates contract so strongly that it makes the buckets jump about;[20]
  • Introduction of Zyklon gas into the gas chambers of Auschwitz through shower heads or from steel bottles.[21]
  • The SS made sausage in the crematoria out of human flesh.[22]
  • Mummified human thumbs were used as light switches in the house of Ilse Koch, wife of KZ commander Koch (Buchenwald).[23]
  • Breathed through a keyhole in a gas chamber door at Flossenbürg to stay alive, cursed the SS when they opened the door, then ran away.[24]

Maybe, just maybe, they believe what they are telling you about the ‘holocaust’, but maybe, just maybe, their contempt for your intelligence and your character is beyond anything you could ever have imagined. — Bradley Smith

But wait, there’s more!
  • Forced to impersonate roosters until they fell out a tree
  • Machined gunned jews sold as meat
  • Gas chamber slides for the elderly
  • Baker causes pile up of bread ravaging jews
  • Secretly followed the ‘Nazis’ and saw jews buried alive
  • Human soup
  • I was shot and thrown into a mass grave
  • The baby bonfire
  • Allowed to sleep while everyone else was gassed
  • Ilse Buyold meets Hitler and jesus
  • My bread was stolen when I fell in poop
  • Escaped the gas chamber due to malfunction
  • Survived the gas chamber because bodies fell on top of her
  • Aunty escapes gas chamber 3 times
  • Growing tobacco from human ashes
  • Surviving with wolves
  • Attacked by ‘Nazi’ bull
  • Mum sneaked into concentration camp disguised as a man
  • jewish rambo – 10 year old shoots his way out of ‘Nazi’ villa with machine gun he found
  • Fermenting jews to make gas
  • Given lethal injection but saved by a homosexual
  • Hid from ‘Nazis’ in a soup kettle
  • Hunger in Auschwitz caused Mum to develop elephantitus
  • Palm reader died in my arms after predicting I will survive
  • Priests and rabbis in sewage tanks
  • Prisoners kill a twin to spoil Mengeles experiment
  • Up to my neck in poop
  • Lethal injection to the heart
  • Latrine beatings and soap made out of mother
  • Escaped gas chamber by flexing muscles
  • It took 3 gas cans to kill the baby
  • They tied me to a tree and jumped around with their pants off
  • jews on medieval stretch racks
  • Satan would have been envious of jewish soap
  • ‘Nazi’ dogs trained to rape prisoners
  • Forced to watch a gypsy have sex with a quadriplegic dwarf
  • Other prisoners laughed at the fat jews
  • Eating human bone marrow
  • Frogs and babies in jars
  • Electrocuted in the escape tunnel
  • When your wife finds out you’ve been burning jews
  • Hiding with rats bigger than the dogs
  • She sold her body for bacon
  • So many lice that the blankets were moving
  • Killing jews on a truck by speeding around corners
  • Singing saved me from the Bergen-Belsen gas chambers
  • Naked dancer disarms SS guard at the gas chamber
  • Killing jews with bicycles
  • Fertilizing fields with dead jews
  • Willy Lermer survives the showers
  • On the gallows twice
  • ‘Nazis’ put jews on crosses
  • Forced to jump 7 feet off the ground (world record)
  • Escaped freestyle executions by crawling away
  • Kicked by the mesmerizing Dr Mengele
  • Escaped Gestapo massacre by falling asleep
  • Hiding in shit for 1 or 2 nights
  • Throwing jews into cement mixers
  • Smuggling bricks in pants to build hiding den from ‘Nazis’
  • Family hiding from the ‘Nazis’ in a haystack for 6 weeks
  • ‘Nazi’ dog pushes woman into pond
  • Butt poking for jewelry
  • Shootings postponed due to lack of Zyklon B
  • Long jump to avoid the gas chamber
  • Brought back to life by a rat
  • Hiding in poop from the baby bayoneting ‘Nazis’
  • Shooting 3 babies with one bullett
  • Zisblatt swallows and excretes diamonds for a year
  • Saved from gas chamber by potato delivery
  • 500,000 children lured into gas chamber with chocolate
  • Spared gas chamber by telling bad jokes
  • Human bone soap ruined by sons playing with it
  • Hundreds of children thrown in air for target practice
  • Mengele stitched a hunchback to another child
  • Outsmarted Mengele by killing my own child
  • Stealing clothes from half-dead for Christmas cigarettes
  • Escaped Auschwitz by walking out
  • jews forced to push jews off mountains
  • A jew gassed with a rat
  • Escaped the firing squad when a friend snatched a machine gun
  • Human chess
  • A piece of jew soot landed on my shoulder
  • Gas van driver let out the jews who looked like his family
    and on and on and on…

https://forum.codoh.com/viewtopic.php?f=2&t=12988


Sources:

[1]
A. Rückerl, op. cit. (note 141), p. 273f.; E. Wiesel, Paroles d’Etranger, Editiondu Seuil, Paris 1982, p. 86; A. Eichmann, in: H. Arendt, op. cit. (note 179), p.184; B. Naumann, op. cit. (note 142), p. 214.
[2]
F. Müller, in: H. Langbein, op. cit. (note 151), v. 1, p. 87; witness Wells in the Eichmann Trial, in: F. J. Scheidl, op. cit. (note 74), v. 4, p. 236.
[3]
H. Langbein, Menschen in Auschwitz, op. cit. (note 152), pp. 383f.
[4]
H. Langbein, ibid., p. 381.
[5]
R. Höß, in: M. Broszat (ed.), op. cit. (note 71), p. 130; H. Tauber, in: J.-C. Pressac, op. cit. (note 17), pp. 489f.; F. Müller, Sonderbehandlung, Steinhausen,Munich 1979, pp. 207f., 217ff.; H. Langbein, Menschen in Auschwitz, op. cit.(note 152), p. 148; B. Naumann, op. cit. (note 142), pp. 10, 334f., 443; S. Steinberg, according to: Französisches Büro des Informationsdienstes überKriegsverbrechen (ed.), Konzentrationslager Dokument 321, Reprint 2001, Frankfurt/Main 1993, p. 206; and many more.
[6]
E. Bonhoeffer, op. cit. (note 213), pp. 48f.
[7]
S. Wiesenthal, Der neue Weg (Vienna), 15/16 & 17/18, 1946; the Soviets wanted to make this one of the charges at the IMT (exhibit USSR-393), but this plan failed due to the other Allies; cf. H. Härtle, Freispruch für Deutschland, Schütz, Göttingen 1965, pp. 126ff.; the Greenwood Cemetery in Atlanta (Georgia, USA) is not the only site to boast a Holocaust-memorial gravestone for 4 bars of “jewish soap”. Cf. also the following corrections: R. Harwood, D. Felderer, JHR 1(2) (1980) pp. 131-139; M. Weber, JHR 11(2) (1991) pp. 217-227.
[8]
Aside from C. Mattogno, op. cit. (note 339), cf. esp. S. Szende, Der letzte Jude aus Polen, Europa-Verlag, Zürich 1945; S. Wiesenthal, Der neue Weg (Vienna), 19/20, 1946.
[9]
Aside from C. Mattogno, op. cit. (note 339), cf. esp. W. Grossmann, Die Hölle von Treblinka, Verlag für fremdsprachige Literatur, Moscow 1947; The Black Book of Polish Jewry, Roy Publishers, New York 1943.
[10]
Aside from note 349, cf. also W. Benz, Dimension des Völkermords, Oldenbourg, Munich 1991; pp. 320, 469, 479, 489, 537ff.
[11]
Reports of the Polish underground movement, Archiv der Polnischen Vereinigten Arbeiterpartei, 202/III, v. 7, pp. 120f., quoted in: P. Longerich, op. cit.(note 271), p. 438.
[12]
Pravda, Feb. 2, 1945, cf. U. Walendy, Historische Tatsachen No. 31: “Die Befreiung von Auschwitz 1945”, Verlag für Volkstum und Zeitgeschichtsforschung, Vlotho 1987, p. 4.
[13]
H. von Moltke, Briefe an Freya 1939-1945, Beck, Munich 1988, p. 420; cf. P. Longerich (ed.), op. cit. (note 271), p. 435; Pravda, Feb. 2, 1945.
[14]
Nürnberger Nachrichten, Sept. 11, 1978, report about eyewitness testimony in the jury court trial in Aschaffenburg.
[15]
R. Höß, in: M. Broszat (ed.), op. cit. (note 71), pp. 161f.; A. Rückerl, NS-Prozesse, op. cit. (note 127), p. 78; H. Grabitz, NS-Prozesse., op. cit. (note191), p. 28.
[16]
R. Böck, Frankfurt Public Prosecutor’s Office, Ref. 4 Js 444/59, pp. 6881f.
[17]
H. G. Adler, H. Langbein, E. Lingens-Reiner (eds.), Auschwitz – Zeugnisse und Berichte, Europäische Verlagsanstalt, Cologne 1984, p. 76.
[18]
R. Aschenauer (ed.), Ich, Adolf Eichmann, Druffel, Leoni 1980, pp. 179f.
[19]
Verdict of the Hannover District Court, Ref. 2 Ks 1/60; cf. H. Lichtenstein, op. cit. (note 84), p. 83.
[20]
F. Müller, op. cit. (note 345), p. 74.
[21]
M. Scheckter and a report of June 4, 1945, written by an officer of the 2nd Armored Division, about Auschwitz; Französisches Büro des Informationsdienstes über Kriegsverbrechen (ed.), op. cit. (note 345), p. 184.
[22]
David Pressac, in J.-C. Pressac, op. cit. (note 17), p. 554, fourth column, lines 17-22.
[23]
Kurt Glass, New York Times, April 10. 1995. from: ‘Death Was Our Destiny’, p. 49-50, by Arnold Friedman, Vantage Press, 1972.
[24]
Arnold Friedman, Death Was Our Destiny, Vantage Press, 1972, p. 49-50

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