WORLD—According to a breaking news report, you should go to church, you insolent heathen. The report, released this morning, which is Sunday, the day people go to church, indicated that you are still at home playing on your smartphone instead of getting your family ready to go mingle with a bunch of weirdos, eat some stale donuts, and enter the presence of the Almighty God to worship Him and learn from His Word. “The data is clear, and the science has spoken,” said one expert who helped run the study underlying the report. “You are not at church, and it is the Lord’s Day, and you should be at church. Therefore, if you want to follow the data, you need to get your butt out of bed right now and get your family ready to worship Jesus.” Well, folks, looks like the science is settled: go to church!
Report: Go To Church You Heathen
August 16th, 2021 Awake Goy
Ultra-thin condoms made of grass are ‘strongest in the world’ – research
Eichmann and the Jews
Report: 14 Israelis infected with COVID despite 3rd vaccine dose
SYRIAN WAR REPORT – MAY 15, 2017: GOVT FORCES MAKE LARGE GAINS IN ALEPPO AND DAMASCUS
Rand Paul Is Sending Hunter Biden Report To DOJ For Criminal Referral
UN Report Condemns U.S., Demanding Speech Control, Constitution Change & More Abortion