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August 4th, 2021 
Awake Goy 
Man Rooting Against His Kid’s Sports Team So He Can Go Home And Enjoy Rest Of His Saturday
CORPUS CHRISTI, TX—Local man Paul Laurel attended his son’s Little League game this past Saturday and cheered and hooted and hollered along with all the other parents. However, he wasn’t rooting for his boy—he was rooting against him, in hopes that his son wouldn’t advance to the next game in the tournament so Laurel could go home and enjoy the rest of his Saturday.
“Hey, batter batter batter!” he called out as his son, Billy, was up at the plate on a 3-2 count. “Swing, batter batter batter, MISS, batter batter batter!”
When his son looked up to see who was taunting him, Laurel quickly changed his tune: “You can do it, sport! Come on, don’t listen to the haters! Knock this one out of the park!”
As soon as his son’s concentration was back on the pitcher, he started back in: “You couldn’t hit the broad side of a barn with a banjo!” he shouted. “Boooooo!!!”
Sadly, his son hit a homer, and Laurel had to stay at the ballpark for another 13 hours.
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