Our “Tales of Wisdom” series aims to highlight important morals and inspire a cherishing of the age-old virtues that can uplift our souls and help us return to tradition. We hope you will enjoy reading this. Somewhere, a pregnant mom’s blissful bump was carrying twin babies—Faith and Doubt. They were healthy and developing fast. One […]
Archive for the ‘Life’ Category
Chili’s Introduces New Silent Fajitas For Introverts
DALLAS, TX — Introverts nationwide can rejoice (quietly, in a room by themselves), as the restaurant chain Chili’s has announced plans to add new silent fajitas to menus across the country. This news will provide welcome relief to millions of people who have long wanted to enjoy fajitas without the loud, sizzling presentation. “I can […]
Study Finds Only 0.01% Of Trail Mix Actually Consumed While On A Trail
CHATTANOOGA, TN — Surprising results from a recent study have conclusively shown that just 0.01% of all trail mix is actually eaten by people while they are on a trail. Researchers were eager to learn more about the demographics of the people consuming the trail mix and the activities they participate in while doing so. […]
Life, Liberty and the Pursuit of New Hampshire: An NBC10 Boston Original
By Shira Stoll, Dan Ferrigan and Alison King Published February 20, 2023 • Updated on February 21, 2023 Life, Liberty, and the Pursuit of New Hampshire follows a libertarian political migration known as the Free State Project. Twenty years ago, one man penned a manifesto encouraging 20,000 libertarians to sign a pledge and move to the Granite State for more freedom. Now “The […]
Soulless Ghoul Doesn’t Cry Hearing ‘Amazing Grace’ On The Bagpipes
BOSTON, MA — Local man Alan Rogers was confirmed to be completely dead inside after he failed to shed a single tear upon hearing ‘Amazing Grace’ played on bagpipes. “Alan is apparently a soulless wraith from the netherworld,” said witness Sharon McMillan. “A man who does not openly weep in that moment cannot possibly be […]
Gulliver’s Travels
This whimsical new version of Gulliver’s Travels spins a musical, laughter-filled story of some very tiny people who learn some very big lessons about life, love—and spaghetti! … Source
Man Wondering Why People Keep Stealing His ‘Come And Take It’ Flag
WICHITA FALLS, TX — Local man Harley Richards has become befuddled as people keep repeatedly stealing his flag that says, “Come and take it”. Source
Peloton Unveils $500 Bike-Shaped Laundry Rack
NEW YORK, NY — Peloton has released an innovative new laundry rack that looks exactly like their original exercise bike, for the low cost of five hundred dollars. Source
Daily Horoscope: January 4, 2023
Venus in Aquarius connects with Jupiter in Aries at 4:08 AM, inspiring a fun, flirtatious atmosphere! People can feel especially generous or open-minded. Agreements may be made as the moon in Gemini connects with Saturn in Aquarius at 6:54 PM, and we could feel especially sentimental as the moon squares off with Neptune in Pisces […]
Local Man Takes 15th Annual ‘Before’ Photo
MEEKER, CO — The new year started off optimistically for local resolution enthusiast, Carson Blenvy, who dove right into his resolve to lose 30 pounds of fat by taking a before photo to help document his future progress toward a sleek, muscular body. Source
Learn how to live without electricity from the Amish community
Modern homeowners rely on electricity for many of their gadgets, tools and appliances. If you want to be more self-sufficient, you can learn from the Amish. The Amish community can teach preppers many things about being self-sufficient and living independently off the grid. Read on to learn how some Amish ways of living can be applied […]
Man Slips Into Deep Depression After Finishing Last Of Thanksgiving Leftovers
NORRISTOWN, PA — Chad Pullman, 39, slipped into a deep depression Monday after finishing off the last of the Thanksgiving leftovers. Doctors say he has been unable to leave his bedroom for two days. Source
Husband Grows Concerned As Amazon Opens Warehouse Location In Front Yard
INDEPENDENCE, MO — A local man found cause for great concern this week when he discovered Amazon was moving forward with plans to build a distribution hub located in his front yard. Source
Introvert Resigns Self To Life Of Bad Haircuts
SEATTLE, WA — After another disastrous trip to the salon, local introvert Sam Johnson has resigned himself to a lifetime of awful haircuts. “No, no, bowl cuts are great,” said Mr. Johnson to his hairdresser as he surveyed the damage. “Definitely what I was going for, that early Jim Carrey look. Thanks so much.” After […]
9 Times Chick-fil-A Employees Saved A Customer’s Life In The Drive-Thru
Not all heroes wear capes, but lots of them wear red polos and goofy-looking yellow suspenders. Here we have collected nine legendary tales of when Chick-fil-A employees literally saved a customer’s life in the drive-thru: Source
Last Man Wearing Pants While Working From Home Finally Caves
SIMPSONVILLE, SC — Sources indicate that the last holdout still wearing full business attire to his work-from-home job has finally caved, going pantsless to his Zoom meetings this morning. “I remember back in April 2020 when I wrote a whole LinkedIn post about the importance of still wearing business attire even when working from home […]
Last Man Wearing Pants While Working From Home Finally Caves
SIMPSONVILLE, SC — Sources indicate that the last holdout still wearing full business attire to his work-from-home job has finally caved, going pantsless to his Zoom meetings this morning. “I remember back in April 2020 when I wrote a whole LinkedIn post about the importance of still wearing business attire even when working from home […]
Child Announces Plan To Remain In Halloween Costume For Next 8 Weeks
ANCHORAGE, AK — After receiving his Halloween costume in the mail early and trying it on, local child Ryden Hollister declared boldly that he would not be removing the costume for the next 8 weeks. “You may now refer to me as Mario,” he told his mother solemnly. “I will not be removing this costume […]
Child Announces Plan To Remain In Halloween Costume For Next 8 Weeks
ANCHORAGE, AK — After receiving his Halloween costume in the mail early and trying it on, local child Ryden Hollister declared boldly that he would not be removing the costume for the next 8 weeks. “You may now refer to me as Mario,” he told his mother solemnly. “I will not be removing this costume […]
Earthquake Causes Thousands Of Californians To Check Twitter To See If That Was An Earthquake
CALIFORNIA — A 3.9-magnitude earthquake over the weekend caused thousands of Californians to pull up Twitter on their phones and post asking if anyone else felt the earthquake. Unsure if what they felt was an earthquake, Californians rushed to be the first ones to post that they thought they might have felt there was an […]
Earthquake Causes Thousands Of Californians To Check Twitter To See If That Was An Earthquake
CALIFORNIA — A 3.9-magnitude earthquake over the weekend caused thousands of Californians to pull up Twitter on their phones and post asking if anyone else felt the earthquake. Unsure if what they felt was an earthquake, Californians rushed to be the first ones to post that they thought they might have felt there was an […]
Hard Luck (1921)
Strange things ensue after a young man attempts to take his own life. Credit: Public Domain Movies– Feature Films: Cinema collection: http://epochcinema.comEpoch Original content: http://epochoriginal.comFeature Films: https://www.theepochtimes.com/featured-films * Click the “Save” button below the video to access it later on “My List.” Follow EpochTV on social media: Twitter: https://twitter.com/EpochTVusRumble: https://rumble.com/c/EpochTVTruth Social: https://truthsocial.com/@EpochTV Gettr: https://gettr.com/user/epochtvFacebook: https://www.facebook.com/EpochTVusGab: […]
Man Who Couldn’t Attend His Mother’s Funeral Sure Glad To See Gay Fetish Festival Still Proceeding As Planned
SAN FRANCISCO, CA — Recalling how the government forcibly kept him from attending his own mother’s funeral in the name of public health, local man Ryan Abbott was thrilled to see that no one will be kept from attending gay fetish festivals because of a new public health emergency. Source
Mormon Wedding Turns Into Wild Rager After Someone Slips Some Caffeine Into The Punch
SALT LAKE CITY, UT — Chaos broke out at the wedding of Addison and Nate Morey last Friday when local LDS hooligans snuck caffeinated black tea from a flask into the punch. Source