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March 28th, 2012 
FAKE NEWS for the Zionist agenda You know those people who insist on whipping out their smartphones to take photos of everything they eat then immediately share the pictures across social networks? That culinary paparazzi takes a verbal beating in this music video.
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Dubbed “Eat It Don’t Tweet It,” the hilarious song tells the story of a smartphone-toting food “connoisseur.” He stumbles upon a grouchy cupcake and lobster that come to life and ridicule him. Undaunted, the avid picture taker wins a trip to appear on a cooking show. His on-air antics get him kicked off the show, but as he’s escorted out, a bear grabs him and ironically snaps a photo before chowing down on human “hipster sashimi.”
The Key of Awesome, which parodies all things pop culture, collaborated with American Hipster on “Eat It Don’t Tweet It.” Uploaded Tuesday afternoon, the clip already has 1,400 thumbs-ups on YouTube.
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“We’re living in a time when organic, local, artisan food is exploding and hipsterism has gone mainstream,” American Hipster channel director Peter Furia tells Mashable.
“The inevitable byproduct of this is a boom in Instagrammed pics of food porn on Facebook, Google Plus and Twitter,” he adds.
Furia, also head of creative at the digital media company Seedwell, sees the song as a “nice musical extension” of the “Is It Local?” skit from TV show Portlandia.
“I love good food, but can’t stand when my friends post food porn,” Furia says. “For me, it falls into that category of tweeting about mundane crap. I’d rather hear about how you just got engaged, ‘Liked’ a Facebook campaign to end hunger, or caught a video of a crazy, naked woman smashing a guy’s windshield.”
The Kolour Kult, an 80s-throwback, electro band, provided the music for “Eat It Don’t Tweet It,” and Key of Awesome actor Mark Douglas played the lead role in the music video.
The American Hipster YouTube channel launched Monday and aims to change the definition of the word “hipster” through a series of 52 weekly episodes that profile trendy young people.
If you can’t get enough of “Tweet It, Don’t Eat It,” check out American Hipster’s making-of video for even more laughs.
Want to sing along? Here are the Lyrics to ‘Eat It Don’t Tweet it’
Life is a dish, best served hot,
And a dish is a book with a menacing plot,
And a plot is a song, dipped in sauce,
That was simmered in a pan with a demi-glaze,
I’m just a kid, in a candy shop,
Of culinary dreams that can’t be stopped,
On a search for the perfect ingredients,
To post on my social medias.You are pathetic, we’re not photogenic
Hurry it up we’re getting cold,
Come down here and taste us, don’t humiliate us,
No one gives a damn bout what you postArtisan bread, dipped in artisan cheese,
dipped in artisan nuts, dipped in artisan greens,
Artisan heirloom radicchio,
This carpaccio’s f***ing ridiculo,
A little foie gras and tuna tartare
Black truffle butter chickweed, ha ha ha!
I’m just a guy with a camera,
In your feed with foods as my canvassa,
Lobster bisque buttered lightly
See you in the bowl and need you inside me
I love soup – don’t call me a Nazi
I’m more like culinary paparazzi
Or gastronomic Annie Leibowitz
Can’t see the food, could you move your tits?
It’s unthinkable to dine out and not record it
Want the world to know I can f*cking afford itDon’t take my picture, don’t put me on twitter
Just get it over with and eat
You could not be dumber, get off of Tumblr
I’m more than just a piece of meatI want lucious cupcakes but can’t do gluten
Broke out in hives from a mere fig newton
A sick addiction to Ramsey’s kitchen
I can’t stop lickin my television
One day the phone rang, was truly blessed
I won a contest to be on Runway Chef
A show about a model who also makes food
Seemed appropriate, I be in the nude,
She was stuffing and tossing and dripping sauce
I was shooting and looting and gitting lost
In the moment of foregone purity
Got escorted out by security
Walked down the stairs, then out of nowhere
Came a big pretentious grizzly bear
He snapped a pic and then dined on me
Oh what a tale of ironyDon’t take my photo, you brown furry mofo
The pain in my heart is very real
I need a martini, I feel like sashimi
You gave me the raw end of the deal
This story originally published on Mashable here.
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